* My Struggles (Depression & Suicide)

This is an easy way to find my depression & suicide based posts. They are my struggle. I decided to group them together after FRUGALISTA [Mom] BLOG brought up an important blog post, and blog overall from HONEST MOM. They blog on it. So do I. I am a blogging mom who suffers from this condition. If you do, too...just note that you certainly are not alone!

** I have added a new tab to the blog that leads HERE - the talk I gave at the Out of the Darkness walk on Saturday, October 3, 2015 to about 900 people. For those who asked for a copy, here it is. **

AM~Erica's Feelings on Mom's Day
I'm not fond of Mother's Day...or Father's Day or Valentine's Day. And depression effects my feelings of motherhood, anyway. My initial coming out to say I have depression.

AM~Erica is in a Corner
When you feel like being back in high school in the cafeteria. Well, no one puts Baby in a corner!

AM~Erica is Wearing Yellow
Written & posted during World Suicide Awareness Day & to kick off Suicide Awareness Week. My coming out about my failed suicide attempt.

AM~Erica Trying to Give Direction to Solution
In this crazy time of politics, when the gun debate is happening...the mental health issue should be too. Because I do feel very strongly about this whole thing!

Why AM~Erica's Heart Aches & Breaks
I didn't share this post on any social media. This was just a venting a needed during downtime. In case you reach this one, just note that I'm obviously still here...

AM~Erica is Just Sitting
I'm sitting here during the Blizzard of OZ contemplating a lot...especially a blog about depression & suicide I came across. This is still an important issue & a stigma that needs to go away!

AM~Erica Seems Stuck on Shell Mountain
Another post I did not directly share on social media...but have really felt like a scene in "Never Ending Story." You know..."not that it matters..."

AM~Erica Just Making You Aware
I'm still a failure. And it's OK. Plus, find out about my friend over at SOLOS.
World Suicide Prevention Awareness Day 2013

AM~Erica May be in a Wilderness
One of my down times. Very down. But I see biblical ties & trying to remain positive.

AM~Erica is Better
Finally feeling better. A long post that talks about the struggle this time & how I was getting thru it. Contains a lot of information. Let's continue to tear down the stigma of depression & beyond!

AM~Erica is Gonna Walk Out of the Darkness
I need your help! At least thru October 4, 2014. It will be benefitting a very good cause that is close to my heart & is right in line of my passion for this struggle I face.

AM~Erica has Raised the Goal
Due to such generous giving in donations, I've upped my goal to walk Out of the Darkness. Will you help me reach it, exceed it, and even force me to raise it again by October 4, 2014? You can help with that...

AM~Erica Sees Heightened Awareness
Talking about the death of Robin Williams & why we will keep hearing about it. Also talks about those spewing uneducated opinions. I also talk about my experience a little bit more.

AM~Erica Gets Labeled
For Suicide Awareness Day, 2014, I have had labels put on me. I'm much more than that. And the struggle is just a part of my story. I'm multi-faceted like a diamond.

AM~Erica Has One More Week
One more week until my walk Out of the Darkness, talking about my upcoming advocacy, fundraising, and those I want to honor.

AM~Erica Walked Out of the Darkness
I did my first AFSP Out of the Darkness walk. The emotions ran high & it was beautiful. Also...I know where I need to head from here. Time to answer a call...there's work to be done!

A Good Cause for AM~Erica to Decorate
A worthy cause, called Marillac, hosts a benefit every year called the Enchanted Forest. It's my second time to participate & my 20th of 22 to spectate. I've also learned how in line this organization is with what I'm passionate about. And it has a story that only God could have made sure was told to me.

TV Episode Shakes AM~Erica's Core
An episode of Sleepy Hollow heavily & surprisingly covers suicide. I wasn't ready. With Tom Mison not being in much of the suicide scenes, makes me wonder if suicide hits too close for him, too. Also an idea my friend Jenn brought up about warnings.

AM~Erica Wants to Describe the Pain
Having a semi-down day, it's a good time to liken the pain of mental illness to migraines. Also includes the exciting passing of the Clay Hunt Veterans Suicide Act thru the Senate.

AM~Erica Campaigns to Change Direction
Kicking off a very important campaign to encourage all to learn & know the 5 signs of mental illness onset, then to take the pledge so we can break the stigma, start talking, and #ChangeMentalHealth.

AM~Erica is So Honored
After much prayer as to what more I could do in my advocacy, God answered in a big way. This is the post about the public announcement of the new leg of my journey with the AFSP.

AM~Erica and the 'NO' Button
I have so much going on! My "NO" button seems to malfunction often, but I believe I know why. The I think it has to mental illness.

AM~Erica is Talking Suicide
Real talk about suicide, the means & methods, and a trigger warning for a portion of it. Also, I'm talking about new terminology & my breakdown of it. Very open & honest. No holds barred.

World Suicide Prevention Day & AM~Erica Still Struggles
During National Suicide Prevention/Awareness Week & World Suicide Prevention/Awareness Day, I was struggling. This post is short. It's a bit discombobulated, but I needed to show that those of us do struggle...and it doesn't pick & choose when it comes on. I needed to raise awareness, and I could hardly keep a thought together.

AM~Erica is 1 of 25
Blog post with statics about suicide, attempted suicide, honor beads, and the reason I walk in the AFSP Out of Darkness Walk for MO-KS.

AM~Erica Spoke for the First Time
I did my second Out of the Darkness walk over the weekend, I helped set up the show, I met more amazing people, plus, I spoke, publicly, for the first time about my struggle...to around 900 people. Read how it went, plus (at the time of this posting), you can still donate thru the end of the year. Please do. Every little bit gets us closer to seeing a world without suicide

AM~Erica's Dealings With All at Level 12: It's Too Much
I'm having a new level of symptoms appear: Sensory Overload!
Just trying to blog it out & try to journal what's happening. Not a blog I'm initially sharing openly, but it's here if you find it. It's time I make good on a promise at this point. Because I love my family & need to stick around for them.

AM~Erica's Dark Side of Despair: There's Work to be Done
I've been back to the pit of despair. I tried making good on the promise I would find help, but the system failed me. I'm sure I'm not the only one this has happened to. We've made some progress, but there is so much work to be done! The dark side of me vs. the dark side of the system could have been fatal. Imagine why suicide is still such an epidemic in this time of getting more "help."

AM~Erica's Beady Talk
As I was putting my Mardi Gras decor away, the beads struck me. It took me a moment to refocus on something more solemn - the difference between Mardi Gras beads & the beads for the AFSP Out of the Darkness Walks. A moment of pondering on this Ash Wednesday as we enter Lent.

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